She always believed in that fantasy world of hers

Here’s a strange thing… me.

So I’m still ridiculously busy, sue me. I’ve also become quite cynical and crabby in my old age. I’m thinking of killing everyone I know, because that will make them shut up already.

Seriously, I cannot wait for the day when I’m self-supported enough to just pick up and fucking leave. To not tell anyone where I’m going, how to contact me, or how long I’ll be gone. Just be gone. I like being alone so much these days, it’s like my comfort blanket. No matter what, no matter how much someone promises you or how much you trust in them, the only one that really matters is yourself. At least at this age, at my age.

I’m starting to get social with a certain group and they’re bugging me already. I’m finding incredible immaturity in college. Everyone is challenging with half-thought half-assed ideas and weak theories. When you try and rationally explain, they talk over you, as though that wins an argument. Please. Grow up. Oh yeah, I’m getting really, really cynical. Why not? These people have proven themselves unworthy of my presence, and so I’m devoting myself to my novel again. I observe and, for the moment, that’s enough.

I’m buying myself a leather journal tomorrow and a few special pens so that I can get to writing everything down in a linear order. I like the idea of first having a hand-written edition of something that will later be put to computer and later to printed page and later… we’ll see. I’m going to go to that evil conglomerate… B&N because they have some of the best leather journals that I know of, and large enough to suit my needs. Whenever I go to a Borders they seem to have these little itsy bitsy teensy weensy excuses for journals. I’m looking for a LEDGER. You know, one of those great big things that you slam down on a table and all the other papers go flying off along with a cloud of dust.

At least in my mind.

Mmmm… pretty. I love blank pages.

Saturday I have a map test in History. Defining the territories of the Native Americans, the different battle places and the original states, along with bodies of water and whatnot. I’m practicing a bit, but not enough. It’s cram time. It accounts for 25% of the grade and I’m amazingly blasé about the entire thing. I wish I weren’t.

Spanish is going swimmingly, in a way. No, don’t ask me how to say shit, you’ll just irritate me.

My, I’m in a mood today.

I’m thinking of chopping the rest of my hair off. It’s pissing me off to. I’m thinking… why not one inch? I could spike it, and use less shampoo. It would save me money. Anyway, it’ll teach all the boys that are interested a lesson. If they want long hair, they have to grow it to. This cannot be a one-sided affair. Lazy bastards.

Alright, I’m gone. Toodles.

-Lady Teigra-